The fantabulous journal of Langley Hudson!

Roadtrip!

Wed, 15 Sep 2004 08:41:16 GMT

Pong, The Mad Dreader and I are going on a roadtrip to Marie's!

Wang

Thu, 02 Sep 2004 07:21:09 GMT

My comrade, du_jiao_xu, one of the 1000 dicks (and thus an admirer of Marie), now has a livejournal.

My huge eggo

Thu, 02 Sep 2004 05:41:27 GMT

Wow, I just had an incredibly mind blowing experience. And so has Marie! It's kind of a long story, so let me start from the beginning!

A few weeks ago I bought the secret diary of Edgar Cayce off GothicAuctions, Cayce was not only a spiritual lightworker, he was also a black sorcerer of the diabolical/sexual arts. 99.89% of it just contained the usual curses and raping instructions that I have long since mastered. I was preparing to take a long, hot, satanic bath when I saw something that caught my eye. A small entry dated August 5th, 1762 (Edgar Cayce was also an immortal) spoke of the greatest magickal experience I had ever laid my blessed eyes on! It was simply referred to as "The Great Ritual," but described in detail how to use a prepubescent boy to reach the inner light of the ego. This is what i've been searching for all of my life! I just needed one thing, a young vibrating stick soaked in magic blood to complete the staff I needed to summon up the Enochian Angels. (Editor's Note: John Dee was the stage name for Edgar Cayce)

There was a code in the entry. The inner voice, my beloved intuition, told me that this code contained the blasphemous directions to consecrating the blood needed in The Great Ritual. Then the voice told me to kill Gramma. These letters had to be transformed into something understandable.

I spent 13 hours sitting in the hot sun, sweating with intelligence, gliding my fingers softly along my enchanted thigh, watching Pong (the darling convict mage!) decode this horrifying puzzle.

Pong & I learned that we needed to act fast - August 5th was one of the 21 Power Dates predicted by the Crow Brothers for ultimate magic success. We needed a boy STAT! Luckily (or perhaps guided by the Crow Brothers?) Pong, whilst in prison, became acquainted with a man who sold mexicans. We quickly wrote to his e-mail address inquiring about a young boy, and his uncle expediently responded with the best news of the day - he had just "taken in" a vampyre that had been 12 human years old when he was changed. His name was Albert Howardson, but I called him Poncho. He was 376 dollars and 12 cents (with sales tax). Pong and I took some of our guns to the pawn shop and came up with exactly enough to buy Poncho and buy some blood from a nearby hospital. Pong found an ancient oak branch in his basement.

That night we had a pow wow and memorized our lines to call the Enochian Angels.

The Great Ritual went off perfectly! We built some energy by running in place and then doing the Great Banishing Act of the Pentagram. Poncho sang beautifully, and Pong (who mastered levitation in jail) hovered upside down above a stop sign, symbolic of our ability to produce a state of confusion. My oak stick swung around at top speed while I read Cayce's words. It turns out the words used in consecrating the blood are from a William Shakespeare sonnet. "My Misstresses EYES are NOthing like the SUUUN" is but a sample of the rhythmic invocation to the Enochian Angels.

The stick consecrated, the Angels appeared and instructed me to drink the rest of the blood, mixed with bleach and wormwood, so that I may be given the knowledge of the cosmos.

I followed their orders, and immediately fell into the sacred coma of spiritual regeneration and knowledge restoration where my mind reverted back to that of a newborn's, and was given all of the insights that i've learned in my past 4 trillion lifes in this dimension.

I awoke in a maximum security hospital, and was immediately confused. I have the innocence and mind of a newborn now, ya know! Luckily, Pong packed my satchel, and so I had my special notebook containing all of my notes from hacking school. I accessed the internet through my roommates life support system. The hospital couldn't keep me for too long though, and I was allowed to go home a week and a half after I recovered, thank Reagan!

Now, here's how Marie got her pleasure:

Somewhere in my endless vaults of recollection (covering my past lifes), I remembered something I experienced during my lifetime as John Wilkes Booth. It was called the Rite of 1000 Dicks. Basically, 1000 male sorcerers convene and simultaneously (and majcickally) make love to one lucky girl. I bet you know where this is going! ;)
Through my mailing list, I organized 1000 wizards who, after reading my essays on Marie published in the November, May, and June issues of Crowmantics Magazine, too fell in love with dear Marie. We all flew out that night (not on planes or jets, we are REAL magicajans), and had a beautiful midnight summit in Bohemian Grove. We all took out our spycam pics of Marie and sent our ethereal penises to her. After we were all done, we camped and played lasertag - WITH REAL LASERS.

The next day Marie called me and said she saw 1000 floating appendages coming at her from all angles, and she loved it! You're welcome Marie! You can pay me back with kisses and cookies, you little slut!

Later,
Langley

ASAPPY story!

Tue, 03 Aug 2004 22:22:07 GMT

HEY GREATJOURNALERS! ADD ME! -> http://www.greatestjournal.com/~langley_hudson

- So, you know, I eventually had to call my lawyer about all the intraweb charges Marie brought against me. Whenever we talk in private, Marie is really into pornography and bisexuality and paganism.

I just don't understand... why she is betraying me like this.

Alright, anyways, the lawyer suggested I change my name and move a few states over. Above all, he stressed that I MUST keep pursuing Marie, but in secret this time.

So from now on, I am going by my wiccan name, ProudGoth Manchild. I am a shaman now (wiccan shaman), and I need a red man's name. Or at least a name that sounds injun.

DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY A CHILD? Male or Female, any race. I just need something PREPUBESCENT ASAP.

Hey guys, I found the future.

Sun, 25 Jul 2004 05:37:44 GMT

Wow, this rules. crowspeaks. Rival crows, or black-feathered allies?

REMEMBER I AM A CROWMANCER, HERE IS THE SITE INCASE YOU FORGOT CROWMANCY, CONVERT THE WORLD!

NEWSFLASH!

Tue, 29 Jun 2004 21:18:07 GMT

I GOT AN E-MAIL FROM THE LIVEJOURNAL ABUSE TEAM!

APPARENTLY SOMEONE HAS THE SAME NAME AS THE 12 YEAR OLD PORN STAR!! OMFG!

E-MAIL ME FOR DETAILS! L0LLERSKATES!1

wow, I missed livejournal more than I missed my old junior high satanic/wiccan cult!

Mon, 14 Jun 2004 20:28:59 GMT

OH TRICKY ERIS, that bastard Pong (*lol* still love ya!) got me arrested for his stupid murder attempt. I was just going to testify ON his behalf, when suddenly the prosecution turned to "whoever had the wormwood is guilty!" and then of course, I was violently screwed.
Yeah, I had the wormwood. The high priestess Mirrorball gave me some when I told her I was going to make some absinthe for my net.goth.sorceror meeting. I was going to make some wormwood, but then Pong came in and told me about Ralph Jonathon's niece, BLANKY. So at the last minute, we decided to murder someone, as sacrifice to Edgarcilla (but don't tell the rest of the Crowmancers that... hell, they don't even know my lj! THANK CROW)
Like all sacrifices, we needed a young, white, virgin girl. UNFORTUNATELY WE WERE UNAWARE OF MISS BLANKETY BLANK BLANK, star of such online hits as Preteen Gangbang's 1-33, and also That's Not My Mouth!

N! E! WAY! Pong and I made wormwood jello to and set upon BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANKs castle in the suburbs. Once we were there, we saw the hobo kingdom still in order (despite my previous assumptions that the hobo kingdom had disbanded). I decided that Edgarcilla would appreciate 1000 dead hobos over one dead 12 year-old slut. So we force-fed all of the hobos the jello.
Like any experienced cyborg witch, I assumed that the hobos would die, we would collect their blood while wearing prosthetic crow beaks, yada yada yada. Alas, we failed to realize that since hobos (and all homeless) are so immune to poison (since they are all addicted to some kind of chemical), the wormwood would just make them stronger in their apathy, and fail to die.
OF COURSE THE CHRISTIAN POLICE FORCE THOUGHT IT WAS US, but I told them it was Pong, because... I didn't feel like going to jail.

BUT OF COURSE THAT IS WHERE I END UP!!!

Anyways, i'm out now, and i'm kind of "on the run" so I won't be going anywhere near hobo kingdom anytime soon. Good thing, because all those homeless people would just persuade me to quit my job and panhandle for the rest of my life.

Pong managed to get a job as a prison warden and then got me out. He's going to apply for a transfer, and then we will both be out of jail!

Sorry if this is nonsensical, i've decided to exercise my inalienable right as a wizard and get high on peyote I bought off the redbone message board.

I'll be back to my proper olde wizard cyborg crowmancer mage self later.

Ode to the Robin Nighthawkins

Fri, 16 Apr 2004 05:02:28 GMT

As I was walking down Wickerburry Lane this morn, I came across a young r'bin. Last week Pong and I experiemented with invoking animal animas and we managed to learn the secret of the bird language. I was wearing my new oxenburred cloak, with a strong septagram dangling around my adam's apple. My feet were covered with my new knee high moccasins (my grandmother is a full blooded indian princess) which (witch) are adorned with jade and hematite. It was clear to all who gazed upon my powerful aura that I was indeed a christian witch, and a very strong one at that.

Anyway, the r'bin looked upon me with it's sorrowful eyes and I asked it, in it's own language of course, why it looked so sad.

po-tee-weet? tweet twe'et twe-weeet?

twa? twawat potawat potititit! came the reply.

I was simply aghast! It turns out that this r'bin bird was a young sorceress named Robin Nighthawkins. It turns out that I was her necromancy tutor in MagicBranch's Magick Shoppe in Dunelbe, Idaho. She was in love with me, she said, and she was worried about Pong. (Pong is currently under arrest for attempted murder - but that's another tale for a'nother entry!)

Robin lost a witch's dule and had become the bird that Thomas "Le Hater" Venne, the strongest animal sorceror in all of France, had so mockingly called her. Robin chirped to me that she was scheduled to die the following morning (tomorry), in a valient attempt to sway the fundamentalist christians from blocking our right to marry.

I decided to make love to this bird! I took her back to my domain, and got to work. She twittered around and gently pecked at my face, and then with her curvy beak, cut the button off my cloak, and it fell to the ground. Then she flew back round behind my head and pulled taught my long hair wrap. The hair wrap extending was the most erotic, exhilirating moment of my life thus far! And I am a necromancer so I get a lot of power almost daily.

Then I took her and let her flutter around on my bare chest (I wore nothing under my cloak) and then down went my pants. I let her circle me while I was standing naked (this is what all birds long to do to humans) and the pleasure lobes in our brain exploded! Then of course Nan Violet, my great grandmother walks in and sees the bird perched on my shoulder. I was bashful, so I put on my most elegant hat. Nan Violet looked like she was going to be sick, but simply asked "Where did that bird come from?" and I responded, it is young Robin Nighthawkins, we've just made love. She looked disgusted, so I grabbed my wand and started forming the black cloud of hatred. But before I could, my great grandfather, Melford Violet, came to the basement. I have always suspected him to be a hereditary witch, because of his strange hair.

So instead of attacking Nan Violet, I rush out the door and down the street. The police, who have been watching my house because of my association with Pong, started to chase me. Of course this fundamentalist town is persecuting those of us who practice the magick artes! When the lead officer came near me, Robin flew down and pecked out his eyes. She saved my life, and I shall never forget it. I shall remember her until she dies tomorry. I will wear a beak and a 32 inch feather hat to remember her by, and tell everyone about the r'bn that is so beloved by me.

Note; I am gay, but that doesn't mean I am exclusively attracted to guys. Also, I don't believe animals should have any impact on how you sexually align yourself.

WALPURGIS IS COMING UP, I am working on a levitating spell to fly over Pong's jail, and let him gaze out of his barred window and catch a glimpse of me, the powerful mage, flying over him and into the moonlight. I believe that this will give him enough hope until his court date, wherein he shall hopefully be acquitted.

Busy day for a busy goth, lol

Tue, 06 Apr 2004 03:51:04 GMT

Today I was really busy!

First, I woke up, had some Count Chocolua (what can I say, even my stomach is a goth man), and then shined by 30 hole Gripfast boots. I originally got them for 75% because no one wants brown boots, but I bought some black shoe polish and shined them up! now they are black, but more of a matte than a shine.

Then I stopped by Tanisha's and got my very first piece of "fake hair"!!! First she braided some synthetic hair to match my warm brown hair so I had a long, waist-length braid at the very center of the back of my head. Then she used camel and chestnut thread to do a "hair wrap" the length of the hair. Then I had a small charm added onto the end. It was the Japanese symbol for Hatred. I hope all the grunge babes don't hit on me, I like 'em goth!

After that, I went to KFC and bought a chicken wrap. I felt so renissance eating grilled chicken at a fast food joint! It was so pagan, I felt at one with the earth. I also had potato salad, and I put some on the ground, after saying a blessing to the Mother Goddess.

I really need to get my hat sharpened for the upcoming holidays...

I printed off this picture for Tanisha:

I think it prooves that black people CAN be portrayed in a positive light.

Thu, 01 Apr 2004 00:18:16 GMT

the Easter Sabbet is upon us, and Pong and I are celebrating my holding an open circle at the place carly brucia was found. we are going to summon her spirit and ask her to repent for all preteen whores!

wait a minute, that's a bad idea!

*giggle* it's almost as stupid as sprint users in florida!

Mon, 15 Mar 2004 01:14:43 GMT

I have deleted some rather boring entries, and from now on this journal will be of my walk with Christ/ book of shadows.

sorry you had to see this twice Mirabelle

Sun, 14 Mar 2004 21:58:42 GMT

Just say NO to idiots.

Tue, 24 Feb 2004 19:14:58 GMT

WELL! I was not accepted at ARE YOU HIP! *gasp*. People started making threats against my person and insulting me because of my race.

BUT I snagged a picture of some girl who is into asian bondage. She's accepting "date offers" now so i'll be traveling shortly.

Other than that, well, who am I to guess people's motives.

I just think they can't hold the Langley. But we'll see, after I shove my magick fucking wand and crystal balls up their asses.

ARE YOU HIPPO?

Mon, 23 Feb 2004 08:17:04 GMT

I APPLIED TO are_you_hip.... I really should get Pong to apply there, everyone would love him!!!

Mercury and I aren't doing so hot right now, I think she found the slash I wrote about Marie. Oh well, Mercury is a dumb broad if she thinks she can do better than me. Shit, i'm a fucking wizard cyborg mage.

Also, I have a badass community called red_hot_dead. I know what you're thinking! You imagine all those hot chicks with skin-tight body bags too! Come, rate whether or not they deserved to die. My spirit guide Delaney told me that when a person dies, they develope a sense of humor. So all these stiff are just beggin' to be voted on, yeehaw!

I managed to invite some people to the community, I hope they post and rate and vote and stuff!

Pong and I invoked Hitler the other night. I guess I forgot to tell you about it, diary, but I told everyone at are_you_hip. Anyways, we told Hitler about the earth dying and he agreed to help us save it! If you want to join the superearth club, you can, but you might have to let Hitler use your body.

Let me know if you're interested!

Thu, 12 Feb 2004 03:14:42 GMT

my crystal ball told me I should take some people off of my friends list. TA HA HE HE

an essay... worthy of the painted books of our Founding Fathers, Yor.

Wed, 11 Feb 2004 07:29:08 GMT

A lot of you recognize me as a familar face, a wizard, a necromancer, a necroromancer, a wormanthy praciticoner, a friend, a lover, a christian... the list goes on and on. But I am also something that shapes my life more than any of these other things ever could. I am a cyborg. Don't be stupid and try to tell me i'm not, and don't tell yourself that cyborgs don't exist. That is just like a petty person, trying to cry for their supper, because they are so petty it doesn't matter --that won't happen.

Cyborgs aren't robots. OK? Now are you happy? Now can you believe what your parents told you to fear? Cyborgs aren't the "bad guys", or those harlot sex-robots on Star Trek. Cyborgs are "people" who are into machines, into the future... into God, and into truthful love.

Sure, cyborgs also take great pride in our appearences... I myself shave the front part of my head and glue microchips on, and often put a "scientific eye" -- a red transparent circular disk that is surrounded by wires. Of course, clothing is also important, and cyborgs wear neon colors and wires and fancy shit like that. We have piercings and tattoos because it enables us to be part of the machine, our creator, God. We buy brands by Cyberdog, Dane 3000, Red Haze, and various other things we find on ebay. Cyborg appearal is basically this - tight, bright lyrca jumpsuits, and lots and lots of wire accessories. The ladies wear bright, elaborate makeup. We are always sexy in our tight clothing... it's just not in our wiring to be anything but.

Growing up as a cyborg in a small town is tough. It's hard enough being a necromancer in a small town. But being a magic cyborg who can summon the dead and worships heavenly crows is too much for the small-minded flesh-lovers. They persecute us, even though we are homo superior. They persecute us, because we have part of the machine in us. The machine that controls, rules, and scares everyone.

We are cyborgs. We are your friends, lovers... We are your children. And you, those of pure-flesh, are able to control the future by being nice to us. We will help you. We are your machina children.

"GIVE ME MORE LIFE."

clumbsy clandantestine clouts!

Sun, 08 Feb 2004 09:35:18 GMT

... That's what we are! *LOL* Just kidding Marie! Today was my third secret date with Marie. She was happy because she runs a bunch of communties on LJ now, and was just given a new one the other day! She's in the shower now.

Suprisngly Pong came along with us too, because my suburban was impounded after that "incident" at the subway. Pong and Marie hit it off right away, and he gave her some new lipstick. The little mother put it on quickly and thickly. Boy, ruby ruby rooo ! :D

Marie wanted me to tell you that even though she pretends to not like people on livejournal whom add her to their friends list, she really loves the attention! SO THE NEWS GOES OUT! ADD HER TO HER LIST, SHE SAID SHE WILL PAY ME BACK IN SEXY WAYS. HE HE HE. And she loves me. She would never tell anyone on her list this, but she gave me a "promise ring" that's really sexy. it's huge, she said it's for my dick. ;)

Oh, she's coming out of the shower now, and she's wearing the lipstick! RUBY RUBY ROOO ROOO WOOO WOOO! RUBY WOW WOW OOOOOOOH ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! WOoOOOWOOOOoooWOOOWOWOOWOWOWOWO

Fri, 06 Feb 2004 22:05:49 GMT

The other day, fruitdemon posted a link to http://www.pornolize.com. This was good, because my Hunnybunnybutt has been telling me how she wants to be "bad", so I used the pornolize on her livejournal entries. It's so funny, check it!!!

Here's the text!:

today's fire: a plowing bit about me, this journal, and barfs big mouth of mine!
time: 08:05 p.

OK...here's some things to know if you
want to stick around:

one: I am a Christian, an outspoken Christian
at that. if you have any prejudice against
Cocksucks, do not befriend me.
two: I am prolife. I disagree with abortion
wholehearedly, along with euthanasia.
I am not your typical prolifer;
I'm not a dripping white-collar male worker.
three: browns journal is friends-only,
comments are friends-only.
four: no vulgarity or profanity.
it shows little respect to others around you.
don't use them here.
five: my friends are a diverse group of asslicks;
I may not agree with all of them or their views
(and vice versa), they are my friends nonetheless.
respect them, and you have my respect.
*******
I can't hate people; I can certainly despise
people's balls, but I can't say that I hate
people. I may not like what some people are
barfing plows, but I can't say that I hate
them. I credit this inability to my faith.
I am instructed to love others because God
loved me first. He charvered that love by
dying on a cross to save mankind (that includes
you!) He sure didn't have to do so; He could
let humanity go their own way, but He didn't.
*******
don't be browned if I don't add you immediately.
if I have asked you to "defriend" me, follow up on
that request.

----------------

*LOL* That is so her!!!!!

slash!

Wed, 04 Feb 2004 22:52:47 GMT

last night I was fantasizing about my mistress marie. I thought to myself, "hmm... I think this is love". but I am not willing to let mercury go! what should I do?!

so I wrote some slash involving me and my mistress.

chapter 1: prologue
it was raining, and I was naked. I slowly wander through the forest of dispair, the forest of conformity. too long have I suffered under the long dark limbs of the willow trees. too long have I sipped water from the cooling pool of eternal torment! woe to those that lived in this acursed forest! for this is the forest of unlove!

chapter 2: the cave
I spy in the distance, a beam of light, radiating something foreign to me. my spirit guide, Delaney, says that the light is an emotion called "love". "what is love," I thought to myself. "I have not heard of this thing called 'love'."
I start to run towards this light. as I near the source of this triumphet emotion, I see that it is coming from a cave. I am puzzled. what is going on in this cave? I venture to the opening... what will become of this?

chapter 3: the anime cave
peering into the lightened depths of the cave, I see a young lady singing. she is singing about the tales of the great anime masters. she is wearing a crop top and cut-off jean shorts. her song is so beautiful, even though it's about her hatred for mormons and holidays, that I fall in love with her. or maybe it is the curse of the leprechauns? (because the light created by love is also a gift from leprechauns, much like rainbows are given to good children whom seek gold treasures). my love for her creats an armor around me stronger than the hairs of the evil giant, that lives above the cave.

chapter 4: singing about love
I start singing too, but my tale is of woe. it's a song from my rock band, autopilot rex.
AUTOPILOT REX
AUTOPILOT REEEEX

Marie turns and looks. she is visiably aroused. she starts running towards me, and my song enchants her clothes off. then I take my armor off. we are both naked, looking at eachother with a mixture of love and curiousity.

chapter 5: first sex
we run towards each other and embrace! the silence in the cave bothers marie, and so the leprechauns come out of their primordial cave and start dancing in a circle around us. the love is overpowering! Marie bends over backwards and does a flip in the air. just like her hero sailor moon. wow, I think to myself, this girl is so anime! as she is spinning in the air, the leprechauns and I push a bed made of feathers with a box spring made out of walnuts (this is a cave, remember) towards the darkest corner of the room. then the leprechauns lead marie over to the bed. then we have sex. 1000 times, every time just as magickal as the first time we layed eyes on each other. then marie gets a devilish look in her eyes. she is way into bondage.

chapter 6: the prisoner of love
she ties me up so I am hanging by my ankles from the ceiling. marie does another flip in the air and ravages me. the leprechauns started playing on their flutes, and that put her in an romantic mood. so we made slow love another 1000 times.

chapter 7: the end
bye.

~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~

yeah, that was written for a special girl her on lj. she knows who she is, even though I promised to keep our affair a secret, I couldn't help but use her name. sorry hunny *lol*. ( I know your into punishments! spanks me!) hee hee hee

x-posted in the adoptedbychrist community

Thu, 29 Jan 2004 10:57:10 GMT

"A miniature stallion filled with hatred for the non-Aryan races will one day parade around an innocent mulatto child and attempt to bite her in the back. The horse will be known by the name of Hootches. -DEUTERONOMY 4:18"

What does that passage mean to you? Speaking for myself (of course), I take it to be about equality among races. Since I guess that book is about battles (both emotionally and literally), I think it also shows that people of all races can unify and fight together. You know this in particular is about a battle because it uses the word "stallion" which is symbolism for war. The horse is also satan because it has hate for a child, and God says that all children are innocent. I am not sure about the name of "Hootches" although it sounds like a modern-day american infernal name. You know, making satan relatable to "US".

Also, since it mentions a "mulatto", it means that interracial marriage is okay, but will be attacked by evil.

Thu, 29 Jan 2004 10:53:14 GMT

Whoa, another long updation situation.

Anyway, Ralph Jonathon is dead. He died of natural causes. I feel bad because of my blatent hatred towards him in his life. He's seen a lot. Pong told me about how when Ralph was drafted into the Korean war, he didn't want to go. He almost left for Canada. This was before he realized his princely duty INCLUDED fighting for america. yes, he was a prince. But his Royal relatives don't want it to get out in the open. They were persecuted when they immigrated to America in the 1800s for being Kings, Queens, Princesses, Princes, Jesters, all the "real magic" of royalty! They were an underground(underworld) monarchy, who ruled over the panhandlers, prostitutes, hobos and over all slummers of Italy. They truly had what is known in scholary circles as Hobo Kingdom.
They continued their reign in America, and raised fleets of slummers across the central midwest.
They eventually gave it all up when they realized that the homeless people of america are that way because of choice. It's just because they don't want to get jobs and are all drunks and druggies. Then they became Scientologists. Ralph was also a Discordian.
The heritage of the family lives on today. Sadly, their family is dying out. I think Pong said something about him being knighted or something.

in memory of Ralph Jonathon: THE HOBO PRINCE IS DEAD, LONG LIVE THE HOBO PRINCE.

Ok, so, I also have a new girl in my life. Her name is Mercury Davenport and she is a sweet thang. She has crazy natural red hair and wears navy blue skirt suits. Mercury is very professional. She is joining the Crowmantic church tomorrow. I CAN'T WAIT.

CROWMANCY IS EARNESTLY TRYING TO INCORPORATE THE TEACHINGS OF GOOD INTO OUR BOOKS. KEEP WATCHING FOR MORE INFO! http://www.geocities.com/cosmic_crow021 AN UPDATE COMING SOON, I PROMISE. MY FRIEND WHO RUNS THE SITE (AND IS A DESCENDENT OF THE 21ST CROW BROTHER) JUST GOT BACK FROM A VACATION IN THE FLORIDA KEYS. HE TOLD ME AN UPDATE IS ON THE WAY =) !!!!!!!111

Sat, 03 Jan 2004 20:50:48 GMT

I just found out that Ralph Jonathon has been spreading rumors about someone close to me. . . >:(

Agent_Pong1111: LANGLEY
Langley_Hudson: wassup/
Agent_Pong1111: RALPH JONATHON HAS BEEN SPREADING SHIT ABOUT AUNT RONNIE1
Langley_Hudson: what/// whats he saying/
Agent_Pong1111: HE SAYS THAT SHE IS NOT A SMART WITCH AT ALL AND THAT SHE IS JUST FAKING ALL THAT POWER LIKE THAT ONE TIME WHEN WE SAW THE LEVITATION CIRCLE AT MILDREDS BLOCK PARTY AND THAT SHE WAS REALLY JUST FLOATING ON A HIGH CONCENTRATION OF HELIUM LIKE SOME MAGICK CLOWN
Langley_Hudson: that is soooo disgusting, i'm going to post it in my livejournal right now
AGENT_PONG1111: COOL I WANT A LIVEJOURNAL TOO

RJ is making fun of my Aunt Ronnie, and is calling her a fake just because she is a celtic wiccan. That means she worships fairies and trolls, and not his Discordian gods, Eris and Loki.

IF YOU READ THIS RALPH JONATHON, YAHOO ME AT LANGLEY_HUDSON AND WE SHALL HAVE A DULE ONLINE.

Also, if I hear you making fun of my cousin, Little Henry Jude, ever again, I will form the black cloud of hatred and destroy your family, and your stupid Scientologist God, Elrond Hubbard!!!

I WORSHIP THE PENCIL!

Sat, 03 Jan 2004 20:41:22 GMT

I am really inadequate about updating! *lol* I sound like aquaman!

Anyway, here's the stash!!!!

For Jesus's favorite holiday, aka Christmas, I only got one pressie... but it was weeeeeell worth it!

The rents and Pong saved up and gave me a gift certificate to Pauls Tattoo. I got a great Tat. It's a backpiece, a huge Pic of Aragorn, with "The King has Returned" written in elvish and spanish above and below the pic. It is beautiful.

Oh, and I have a new rival!!!! Pong's ex-girlfriend's new BF, Ralph Jonathon. He is a powerful mage in the Discordian tradition. That means he follows no rules!!! We are going to have a wizard's dule on the solstice!

Yesterday I was forming a thoughtform to be my slave. I want someone to gather skeletons for me so I can try out the new necromancy spell I read on a satanic message board, Redbone. It was originally supposed to be a fan message board for the indian band, Redbone. But the name is confusing and so the satanists took it over! "HOW" about you go back to your reservations, Indies?! *lol* I'm thinking of making my "LJ" SATANISTS ONLY! *lol*

hooo ha hoo haa hooo ha

Tue, 09 Dec 2003 21:49:54 GMT

Well, i'm back from my sabbatical! ... I guess I forgot to tell you guys about my Sabbatical. Actually I got back yesterday. Not like anyone reads this but Pong.

Anyway, this morn while I was letting the water filter out of my hair, I had a thought so pure and innocent that it made my hat stand errect.

I was thinking, why don't we create a majickal environment to harbor our sacred thoughts. One who's clientel is only witches and crowmancers and necroromancers... A place where we naughty ones can be ourselves...

Then I thought, Oh yeah. Livejournal.

mayhamsandwiches!

Sun, 09 Nov 2003 01:18:34 GMT

I was at Subway earlier with Pong the Goth, when we overheard some construction workers talking about some little girl they've recently killed.
Pong and I immediately ran to my suburban and jumped in the backseat, where I had my crystal ball. I said the Necro-romantic chants and the murkyness of the crystal ball parted, and I could clearly see the little girl. But she looked more like a 40 year old man with a tiny dress on. And they didn't kill her, they just tripped "her" into a garbage can.
But I decided to make revenge anyway. I took out a lead pipe that was in the front seat, and broke the front windows out of the Subway store. Pong put on his baseball hat that says "I like kill!" and together we terrorized the patrons for a good 30 minutes, before we ran into the alley nearby. I guess I forgot that I drove my surburban!

anyway, here is a joke for you:
q. what do you do after you rape a 12-year old deaf, dumb, and blind girl?
a. break her fingers so she doesn't tell her mother.